Taylor's Cake of Life
by LeFay Strent
Summary: Whoever came up with the phrase, 'it's a piece of cake' should be shot and set on fire, because nothing in Taylor's life was a piece of cake. "At least you're a pretty kitty?" Al tried. Taylor hissed. - Sequel to "Al's Ways of Dealing With Ed" -
1. Chapter 1

**So practically everyone who read _Al's Ways of Dealing With Ed _wanted a sequel. **

**So my readers demand it, so shall it be.**

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Taylor Riley was a cat.

In all of the weird turns her life had taken, this one definitely topped the cake. And it wasn't even the good kind of cake. It was the kind that had been left out for days until it sprouted mold and that mold grew to be a living organism and obtained higher thought enough to form sadistic ideas of, "Hey, what kind of torture can I put Taylor through today?" And the layers just kept adding on. Whoever came up with the phrase, 'it's a piece of cake' should be shot and set on fire, because _nothing_ in Taylor's life was a piece of cake. Not an ordinary cake anyway. Her cake was evil and hated her.

Why was Taylor's cake evil? Because being forced into a different world and into deadly, emotionally scarring situations wasn't bad enough. Because Truth decided to spit in her face and transform her into a _cat_! Well, it wasn't Truth's actions that actually turned her into a feline, but she had no doubt it was laughing its albino ass off at her predicament right now and that was all the reason she needed to blame it!

Truthfully, the blame fell on Al's shoulders. Unlike a month ago when Alphonse had transmuted his brother into a half kitty boy out of anger, this time he had done so by accident. And Taylor didn't even have the luxury of opposable thumbs. Oh noooo, she had to become a full blown cat! Small, lithe, fur covered body and all! She wasn't mad at Al. Well, she wasn't that mad anyway. She was furious with her shitty luck. She may have Irish blood running through her veins but the only luck it gave her was a knack for finding trouble.

Taylor sighed, as much as she could in her new form anyway. In front of her paced the very frantic suit of armor known as Alphonse. He was raving apology after apology and freaking out about the fact that Taylor was a cat. It was funny how Taylor was able to just sit there and watch him do so. You'd think she'd display a little more emotion. Oh, she had initially. Then, after about ten seconds, the shock wore off and she was resigned to the fact that the world(both hers and this one) hated her. Now she just wanted to kick the world's ass! That would be kind of hard to do as a cat though… Claws. She had claws now. And she would use them.

"It's okay, Al. Just calm down so we can figure this out," Taylor spoke but all that came out were a few meows. _Meows!_ How frustrating and demeaning…

Fortunately, Al was something of a cat whisperer. Sensing her intended words, Al slowed down and sank into a nearby chair. The two of them were currently in a secluded section of the National Central Library. The three of them, her, Al, and Ed that is, had recently been looking into finding a way to send Taylor back home by researching into the arrays tattooed to Taylor's body. The trio had begun their research in Dublith with Izumi but after a week they needed more research material that only the well stocked library of Central could provide. And they'd only been here a day, Ed going to report in to Mustang, Al and her going to the library to bring books back to the dorm where they would meet up, and then _this_ happened.

How did this happen exactly? Taylor wasn't exactly sure how it began but somehow the conversation between her and the armored boy had turned to cats. Al was describing his favorite cat, a breed that wasn't found anywhere in her world and was so hard to pronounce that Taylor dared not repeat it. He quickly found that it would be better understood if he simply showed her instead of trying to describe it. So he drew a circle on the floor of the library(with the full intention of erasing it afterwards, since Al was not by any means into vandalizing) and then he sat a small table in the center, planning to transmute the wood into a life-size figurine of the cat, show Taylor, and then return the table back to its original shape. …Then Taylor had to choose _that_ moment to trip, knock over the table, and fall into the circle just as Al activated it. Sparks of blue alchemy later and there sat a ginger haired cat. It was by far the _stupidest_ series of events Taylor could think of, but that was her life and her life loved to make her miserable.

As Al sat in one of the wooden, straight back chairs by the larger table holding their collected books, Taylor sat on her haunches, gazing forlornly at the pile of clothes on the floor next to her. "I feel naked," she whimpered. At least she had fur. It was good for one thing at leas- whoa! Her tail had rings in it! Darker shades of fur ran around her tail in thin ringlets, moving up the appendage and into her body fur to practically disappear. The lines of darker fur were still there, just really hard to see if you weren't looking.

And then Taylor thought, _Why do I care so much about my fur?_ And directly after that question she pondered over the sheer oddity of those words. No person should ever need to wonder about their fur. Mostly cause people shouldn't _have_ fur!

"I can't believe this happened," Al muttered. Taylor tuned back into the present, finding it almost difficult to focus on Alphonse's words because sounds were echoing in her large ears, smells were assaulting her nostrils, and she felt the need to flick her head in every direction to find out where all of the stimuli was coming from. Cats were very easily distracted, she was finding out quickly. "At least you're a pretty kitty?" Al tried.

Taylor hissed. She straight up hissed. The action alone made her shake her head rapidly and widen her eyes. That had felt…strange. And she felt the odd urge to repeat said action.

"Sorry," Al apologized for the umpteenth time, hanging his head in shame. After a few moments, he glanced back up at Taylor and appeared to be surveying her. "You can still understand me and everything, right Taylor?"

The ginger cat rolled her eyes, happy that she could still do that at least. Rather than attempt words again, she bobbed her head up and down to convey that, "Yes, I can understand you, thank you very much. Now turn me back? Now? Pretty please?"

"That's a relief," he sighed. "How do you feel? I mean, you're not in any pain, are you?"

Taylor stopped for a second to really think about it. When the transmutation had first started she had felt a tingling sensation, then something else… She guessed that whatever happened in the middle had been blocked out somehow, for which Taylor was extremely grateful. The process of turning into a cat sounded excruitiating and probably had been. She just didn't remember feeling much of anything. After the disorientation, she had sat up and then the realization that something was wrong dawned on her.

When Taylor finally shook her head in answer, Al said, "Alright. I suppose I should find a way to turn you back now."

Taylor gave him a look that said, "You think?"

Al read her perfectly and chuckled, "Okay then. I'm not sure how something like this could have happened…but if I use the right array I should be able to reverse it. I'm not sure what exactly to use. Perhaps a pentagon to enable more room for transferring carbon with water and…"

Her tail flicked in an annoyed manner. _Yes Al, just keep talking about elements and geometric patterns and whatnot. I completely understand what you're saying._ Usually she didn't mind when one of the boys went into alchemy talk, finding it almost funny at times. Not today. She was a cat and she was moody. Sue her, she was having a bad day.

"Brother should be back at the dorms soon. We can go meet up with him and come back to figure this out. I'm sure he'll figure something out!"

"NO! Al, if you love me you will _not_ tell Ed that I'm a four legged ball of fluff!" Taylor begged. Of course, her pleas came out in a stream of screeching meows and hisses. In the end, she got her point across.

"You don't want Ed to know?" Al guessed correctly. "But why not? You know he'd want to help!"

Taylor lowered herself to the ground and covered her face with her paws, "Please, it's mortifying enough that I have to experience this. I don't need the humiliation of Ed seeing me like this too."

Al translated her pitiful sounding meows and stated, "You're…embarrassed?" Taylor's ears lowered in response, telling Al that he was correct. "Taylor, there's no need for you to be ashamed. Ed wouldn't think any less of you. In fact, he'd be so mad at me he wouldn't even think about it." A dark cloud loomed over him. "Maybe you're right. Maybe we should just keep this to ourselves. I don't want to face Brother's wrath."

Taylor perked up, "So our little secret, right?"

Al nodded, though more to himself than in answer. "Okay, we'll just have to-

"Excuse me," a voice interrupted him. Both heads turned to see a dark skinned library worker, hair tied back in a ponytail and chocolate eyes staring at both of them in a disapproving manor. She had been working there for many years and was used to seeing the Elric brothers around, just not accompanied by an animal. "Sorry, but you can't have pets in the building. Library policy."

"Oh…" Al said, at a loss due to his plans being derailed.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

Alphonse, being the farthest thing from the confrontational type, hurriedly agreed, "Sure! We'll just be going then."

Without preamble, Al scooped Taylor up. She protested loudly, not liking being manhandled and complaining that she had legs damn it! She could walk! Al whispered an apology to her and quickly gathered the books they had collected, intending to check out. As Taylor watched the librarian check the books out for him, she assessed her new view and found that she rather liked it. In fact, if she could get onto Al's shoulder somehow, she would have a more un-obscured view of the scenery. Taylor wasn't sure why she wanted to, just that the urge to find higher ground was there and she was happy to oblige. So she maneuvered her limbs, awkwardly shaped but made for climbing, and shimmied up the best way she could. Using one of Al's shoulder spikes for leverage, she managed to crawl onto his shoulder. Her attention swiftly became occupied as she took in the many sights.

As they left, Al laughed, "You're just like a real cat. Any chance you would stay this way a little longer?"

Taylor gave a deep, rumbling meow, showing her displeasure.

"I'll take that as a no."

They made good time getting back to the dorm. As Al went inside, he called out for Ed, but found that he was not there.

"Guess he's still gone. I hope he didn't get in trouble with the Colonel," Al sighed. Taylor gave the equivalent of a kitty snicker. When _wasn't_ Ed getting into it with Mustang?

Al sat both the books and Taylor onto the coffee table. The small cat turned to him, sitting down with her tail wrapped around her feet. "What now?" she asked.

"I'm going to have to go back to the library. It shouldn't take long, maybe a couple of hours. But I'm pretty sure what I need to look for," Al told her.

Taylor blinked at him, then glanced around the room as if to ask, "You're gonna leave me here? All alone?"

"I'm sorry, Taylor. But you heard the librarian. I can't take you with me."

"Then put me in your armor!" she retorted.

"I'll try to get back before Brother does. Until then, take care of yourself." Then he waved at her and went to leave.

"Alphonse!" Taylor screeched, dashing towards the door to stop him. However, she ended up falling off of the table due to her unfamiliar cat body. By the time she had picked herself up off the floor, Al was already long gone. "Fml," Taylor huffed.

For the next twenty minutes, Taylor acquainted herself with her new body. It was difficult to walk at first, the tail throwing her off, but soon she got the hang of it. She paced back and forth, again and again, until she wasn't wobbling like a drunkard cat. Something that was bothering her more than the tail were the…whiskers. Every time they brushed against something it made her nose twitch with the urge to sneeze. She did a couple of times. After sneezing for the fourth time she tried to rub the monstrosities with her paw to soothe them. The motion wasn't smooth enough for her liking so she licked the pad of her paw and rubbed it over her face and whiskers. When she did it again, she paused in mid swipe.

"Oh God…" she muttered. She lowered her paw back to the floor, deciding to push the incident far away into the recesses of her mind, because Taylor was a girl and _not_ a cat. And girls didn't lick their paws to wash their faces. Therefore, Taylor had not just done so.

She was drowning in her denial when the door opened. Her reaction was spontaneous. Taylor darted over to the door, meowing, "Thank goodness you're back, Al. I'm losing my ever lovin' mind!"

"Damn it, how many times do I have to tell him not to pick up freaking strays?" an irritated voice said, one that was definitely not Alphonse.

Taylor stopped in her tracks, glancing up slowly in trepidation. There, in all his black, red, and golden glory was Edward, fisted hands on hips and eyes staring accusingly down at her. Behind him, the door swayed shut, ensuring no escape.

And a new cruddy layer to her cake of life had been added.

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**Don't you worry your pretty little heads, this isn't the end of things. I'll be adding two more chapters, making this story a three-shot. This originally was going to be a one-shot...but I got carried away with it. ^_^' Care to see just how carried away I'm going to get with this? Then stay tuned. I'll try to update soon.**


	2. Chapter 2

Edward Elric was in a foul mood.

Not only did he have to put up with Mustang for the past hour or so, he'd spent the better part of thirty minutes running from Major Armstrong who was trying to use the "cheering up methods that had been passed down in the Armstrong family for generations"! Ed made a mental note to _never_ look in any way depressed around the man ever again. But it wasn't his fault! Mustang had put him in a bad mood! He was such an arrogant, pompous, morally corrupt, manipulative, egotistical…

A timid meow brought him back to the matter at hand. Oh yes, _that_… To make a long story short, Ed's day had been rough enough without the added headache of his brother's tendency to pick up stray cats. And said brother wasn't even here to be yelled at for it! It just made him angrier because he had nothing to take his frustration out on!

From her place on the floor, Taylor took a step back from Ed. Seeing the elder Elric so riled up wasn't that uncommon. However, his ire had never been directed at her this severely. It made her duck her head and meow an apology, even though she hadn't done anything wrong.

Ed blinked down at the cowed feline. It almost seemed like the cat was afraid of him. The idea made him slap his forehead and groan, "Great, now I'm scaring animals." The cat's ear flicked in his direction, her tail swaying in a nervous manner. He kneeled in front of it, expecting the cat to either run and hide or lash out at him. It was the instinct of a cornered animal and, although this one certainly looked like one, she merely watched him with bright green eyes. Ed's own eyes narrowed at the tiny creature, "Okay, so it's not your fault I'm having a bad day and that my brother has a bigger heart than a brain. But seriously, how does he keep finding you guys? Is there catnip hidden in his loincloth?"

Taylor stared at him, unblinking. What should she do? It's not like she could tell him the truth. She lacked the proper vocal cords for that. Besides, it'd mortify her if Ed realized it was her. He'd tease her to no end. She knew because she did the same thing when Ed himself had experienced close encounters of the feline variety. That left her with her only option: sit there and look cute.

Edward frowned at himself while the cat showed no reaction. He wasn't sure why he was talking to an animal, but for some reason it made him feel a little better. "Here's the deal, Cat," he declared, pointing at the feline. "I'll let you hang out here until Al gets back. But _only_ until then! I'm telling him to put you right back where he found you, got it?"

"_Meow_?" Taylor said, somewhat amused.

"You don't understand a word I'm saying, do you?"

"_Meow_!"

"…"

Ed stood, trudging over to the lone couch to flop onto the light blue cushions. He went to prop his feet on the coffee table when he noticed the stack of books there. Expression turning curious, he slid to the edge of his seat and examined them. All the novels were on alchemy. More importantly, they were related to the subject him and the others had been researching all week. If the cat wasn't proof that Al had come back here sometime in Ed's absence, this more than confirmed it.

"So where's Al and Taylor?" he asked, at first to no one, but found his gaze straying over to the cat. She sat on her haunches in the middle of the room, cocking her head to the side to stare at him. Ed propped his elbow on his knee and settled his chin on his palm, watching the cat glumly, "I swear, they better just be out grabbing some grub."

Taylor rolled her eyes. So typical Ed behavior, to think of his stomach.

Edward didn't catch her very human-like eye roll, having gone back to the stack of books and completely ignoring the kitty. He scanned through the various titles again, sight honing in on one particular thick and worn brown tome. Swiping it up, he held it in his automail hand as he began to skim through the pages to find the interesting bits. One good thing he had discovered over the years was that automail never got tired. So he could hold a book up for hours without the limb ever wearing out from the strain.

The blonde alchemist had sifted through a quarter of the book when he went to turn another page and was startled enough to jump. A furry head with two large ears peeked over the seat of the cushion to his left, two narrowed eyes watching him with glinting mischief. Ed couldn't be certain but he had the feeling the cat had been sitting there, watching him, and waiting for him to notice her. And his surprise only seemed to amuse the feline.

Ed scowled at her, "What are you, a ninja cat?" He hadn't even noticed when the cat had moved from the middle of the room over to his sitting place.

"_Mew_," the cat said innocently.

He remained silent, choosing to go back to his book and studiously ignore the cat again.

Taylor watched him for a minute, smirking at how badly she had surprised Ed. Turns out, cats could be _very _quiet and sneaky when they wanted to be. Who knew being one would have advantages?

The girl-turned-cat contemplated what she should do next. Just because she had to wait for Al's return and just because she didn't want Ed to find out the truth didn't mean she couldn't have a little fun first. She could do anything without any consequences cause she was supposed to be a regular cat and cats had no nefarious intentions… Okay, maybe there were some limits. She didn't want to piss Ed off to the point where he'd throw her out. It's not like he knew it was _Taylor_ underneath all this fur. So what could she do that wouldn't bring the repercussion of being kicked out?

Taylor's eyes roamed over Ed's form. Despite his feathers being ruffled when he first came in, the presence of a book relaxed him like nothing else could. This was the perfect time for Taylor to strike.

Ed caught a blur of movement in his peripheral vision and glanced to his left. On the couch beside him was the ginger haired cat, watching him intensely as if she were strategizing. The very thought of a cat _strategizing_ almost made him snort. He shook his head and went back to his book yet again. His attention didn't stay there for long.

The cat decisively walked to him, onto his lap, and plopped herself over his thighs. Ed's eyebrow raised at it, seeing it lying in such an odd position with her front legs stretched out in front of her and her hind legs stretched out far behind her. It was nearly comical.

"Do I look like furniture to you?" Ed muttered at the cat.

"Yes, very pretty furniture," Taylor smiled to herself.

Edward grumbled again but surprisingly didn't push her away. She glanced up to his face to find him reading once more.

_Heh, guess he's okay with it_, Taylor mused, pulling her limbs to her body in a fashion she had seen a million cats lay in. She even wrapped her tail around herself for good measure. It was becoming very easy to control this new body the longer she spent in it. Although, that might not be a good thing…

With Taylor right where she wanted herself, she snuggled into Ed's black clothed torso. She rubbed her head against the toned muscles of his stomach, enjoying the firmness that held just the right amount of softness. She wondered how it would feel if Ed had his shirt off. Then she considered ways to crawl under his clothes. Hey, she was a cat, remember? She could totally get away with it!

For now though, Taylor settled for basking in the heat Ed's body exuded. He was _so_ pleasantly warm. She had always liked being warm, since Taylor's body didn't run as hot as most people's did. That yearning only increased with this new body. Cats were attracted to warm places, and Ed was _hot_.

"Fine! I'll scratch you, you persistent fur ball!" Ed exclaimed, having had enough of the animal's fidgeting. Truthfully, Taylor hadn't been asking him to scratch her. But she supposed that her behavior could have been misinterpreted. She had looked like any other cat seeking affection.

Taylor's thoughts screeched to a halt as a gloved hand rubbed down her spine, sending tingles of pleasure through her small body. Her back arched of its own accord into the touch, seeking more of that feeling. Ed's hand ran over her sleek fur again and again and Taylor just melted. Oh, and when those fingers scratched roughly at her ears? Her brain imploded.

A vibration rumbled through her chest, making Taylor distantly wonder what it was. She dismissed it as unimportant and chose to focus on the wonderful feelings Ed's hand was bringing her. From the sound of his voice, Ed seemed to be smirking at her reaction, "Spoiled cat."

"_Meooooow_," the cat replied, purring up a storm. Edward shook his head at it, deciding that the furry beast wasn't half bad. He continued to run his fingers through the cat's coat as he returned to his book.

This went on for…Taylor didn't know how long. She was too busy eating up the attention Ed was bestowing on her. Her eyes were closed in absolute, blissful contentment as her claws lightly pawed at the leather of Ed's pants. Scratchies…who knew?

Edward sighed, suddenly lifting the cat off his legs and sitting her on the couch. Taylor meowed, confused.

"Alright Cat, I gotta go get a shower," Ed grunted, sauntering toward the small bathroom. Taylor, slightly peeved, got up and trailed after him.

"Noooo, scratch me some more! Don't leeeeaaavve mee!"

Ed turned around and watched, bemused, at the cat who followed him, meowing in a way that could only be described as forlorn. He cocked an eyebrow, but continued to the bathroom. Leaving the door slightly cracked, Ed removed his jacket and shirt, grabbing a towel from the nearby shelf. He turned to see the ginger haired kitty watching him intently from the cracked door.

"Cat, you're freaking me out. I wish you wouldn't watch me like that. It's unnerving." Ed turned his back to the cat, who blinked and continued its stare. _It's just an animal, it's not like it's checking me out or anything,_ Ed thought, shrugging.

Taylor watched, awestruck, as Edward started removing his typical leather pants. She was dumbstruck that he was really _taking his pants off_ in front of her. But then again, in her new cat body, Edward would never know _she_ was the one watching him undress. If she could've smiled, she would have, maliciously.

She watched as Ed slid deftly out of his leather pants, standing in his boxers. Taylor found that even in her kitty form, her mouth could still water. She looked over the smooth expanse of his back, darkened and toned from spending so much time sparring in the sun. Her eyes trailed down his back, over his loose boxers, and down to his legs, his flesh leg toned and thick with muscle, his automail gleaming. Taylor drank in the sight of him, finally letting his guard down in front of her.

Ed took one last wary glance at the cat, still gazing intently at him, as though she were waiting. He chided himself for letting a silly animal make him feel like someone like…Taylor was watching him. Ed laughed at himself and looked at the cat. "You're just a dumb animal, I don't know why I'm acting all shy."

Before Taylor could hiss at Ed about the "dumb animal" comment, he turned and shimmied out of his boxers, giving her a full view of his behind. _Funny, _Taylor thought, _I thought it was characteristic of _dogs_ to drool_.

Giving the cat one last glance, Ed stepped into the shower. Letting the warm water trail over his body, he let out a long sigh. Edward loved showers. They were a place for him to let down his guard and simply think.

Taylor, wishing she could just jump into the shower with Edward, quickly grew bored with watching the shower curtain and turned to find something more entertaining. She padded back to the couch, hopping onto the spot Ed had recently vacated and discovering some of his warmth still clung to the cushion.

"What now?" she asked herself, sprawled out on the cushion while listening to the tapping sounds the shower made from the bathroom. Scratchies would have to wait until Ed reemerged from his shower. The cat girl didn't find much else entertaining at the moment so that left her with…nothing. She couldn't draw, couldn't play her flute, couldn't even read the alchemy books in front of her! Not having opposable thumbs was frustrating!

Taylor sat up into a long, languid stretch. Unbeknownst to her, this caused her claws to dig into the sofa. When the stretch ended and she attempted to retract them, the claws remained embedded in the material.

"Crap," she muttered, tugging. The material rose but didn't release her. She glared down at her captor, "You stupid couch! Give me back my paws!" She struggled fiercely, all the while thinking in the back of her mind how ridiculous she must look. Cats stretched all the time and they didn't get their claws stuck! Why her?!

Growling, quite literally, she pushed down onto the cushion, extending the claws further. And _then_ she retracted them. This time, they complied.

Taylor glanced from her paws to the cushion, "Hmmmm…" She knew it was stupid, but the curiosity had taken hold of her. She couldn't help but press down upon the surface of the soft cushion and sink her claws into it as far as they would go. She pulled one paw up and pressed it back down as she brought the other one up, repeating the action over and over. For some reason, the more she did this, the more her instincts screamed at her to do it again. It felt…good. To have her claws sink in and _rip_. _Tear_. _Shred!_ _Must shred!_

Abruptly, Taylor ceased all movement. As the realization of what she was doing came to her, she stared down in horror at her paws. Swiftly, she jerked her paws out of the cushion and jumped off of the couch and onto the coffee table. Shaking herself, her mind remind her, _You are a human! Humans don't knead their claws into objects, especially defenseless couches! Don't give into temptation!_

_Right!_ Taylor agreed with herself. With that decided, she put her efforts into acting less like an animal and more like a human. She glanced around the room, eyes searching for something she could do that would remind her of her human nature. Her sights fell on the books, scanning over the titles. It pleased her to find that being a cat did not affect her ability to read. Opposable thumbs she did not have, but brain power she did!

Happy with her assessment, Taylor pushed the smallest book from the stack over to the side where she could use her paw to turn the pages with minimal difficulty, the process taking a couple of minutes in her current form. This would have to do for now. So she settled herself on the table to read until Edward came back.

Clean, relaxed, and ready to take on the world, Ed stepped out of the bathroom…only to be met with the oddest sight.

"Cat…are you _reading_?"

Taylor glanced up at Ed's voice. The book hadn't been particularly interesting. Nevertheless, her attention had been focused on it to where she hadn't heard the shower cut off. Now Edward stood outside the bathroom doorway, the only clothing item on being a dark pair of sweatpants. His hair had been left down, damp and tangled.

Edward stared at the cat as the furry animal stared back at him, sitting there on the coffee table with an open book in front of it and in the middle of turning a page. The cat's paw slowly lowered the page down and slid the book a few inches away as if saying, "No, I wasn't doing anything at all. You're imagining things."

He blinked in disbelief before barking out a laugh. It was just absurd! Cats couldn't read! The cat was probably just mimicking what she saw Ed doing earlier.

The blonde approached the table, bending down to snatch the open book up. The cat watched him as he examined it. "At least there aren't any rips. I guess you like books then?"

"_Meow_…"

He shook his head, tossing the book onto the stack of others and strolling over to the dorm room's mini fridge (cause there are totally mini fridges in the dorm rooms, or so the author says). Not much of anything was inside, just an apple and a bottle of milk that Al stubbornly insisted Ed should drink. Instead, Ed glared at the bottle and opted for the apple.

Taylor's eye twitched the entire time. Did Edward not realize that it took her a whole two stinkin' minutes to position that book in the right spot? Stupid, inconsiderate alchemist! _Oh wait, what was that claws? You still have the urge to scratch? I'll give you something to scratch!_

With a battle cry, Taylor leapt from the coffee table, limbs stretched out in a graceful arc, claws extended to slice through the air, ears slicked back, teeth barred, tail fluffed in agitation.

"_Mrrrraaaaaawwwww!_"

Edward, apple in hand, turned around just in time to see the cat jump off of the coffee table and do an impressive face plant as it landed. The apple nearly fell out of his grasp as he snorted with laughter. Never had he seen a more clumsy act. And to make the situation more hysterical, the cat sat up, shook its head, and glanced around in bewilderment. She sat up and patted her nose gingerly, looking at her paw as if to check for blood.

Where the hell did Al find this cat?

"Ow, that probably wasn't my best idea," Taylor admitted, making sure she didn't break her nose. Not being used to this body, she had underestimated her leg strength and had shot up into the air at an remarkable height. The launch towards the ceiling had freaked her out so much that her descent was made by a series of flails that resulted in a face plant. And here she thought cats were supposed to land on their feet…

Ed continued to watch as he ate the apple, the cat paying him no mind as she tried to walk right. The hit to the kitty's head must have cracked something because she took two steps and fell on her side. He snickered.

Edward choked on his bite of apple when the cat glared at him. Yes. _Glared_. Since when did cats glare like that? Or at all, for that matter? This one was staring at him like she was threatening him. No, she _was_ threatening him. The cat held one paw up, claws extended as if to say, "Keep laughing. See what I do to you."

Swallowing back his amusement, Edward decided to take pity on the animal by going back for the milk in the fridge, sitting the apple on top to free his hands for the task. They didn't have any bowls in the room so he made due with a small cup, crinkling his nose as he poured the vile, opaque liquid into it. Making sure to hold the cup with his automail hand, he took it over to the cat and sat it down before her.

Taylor took one look at the cup of milk and hissed. Did he actually offer her milk? Had he forgotten about her lactose-intolerance? Oh yeah, she was a cat, duh. That didn't change the fact that she felt offended.

Edward blinked in astonishment as the cat _hissed _at _milk_. What happened to all cats loving milk? Was she just not hungry? No, she was glaring at the glass of milk as if it had done her a personal wrong. Definitely some hatred for milk going on there.

"So you like to read _and_ you don't like milk?" he asked the feline. In answer, the cat stretched a forepaw to push the cup back towards Ed. He chuckled heartily, bending down to swipe the cat up. He held her suspended in the air, smiling at her, "You're a cat after my own heart, ya know that?"

The cat stared at him dully, then used one paw to push on his nose. "_Meow_," the cat said, her tone saying how she thought Ed was a dork.

He grinned and shook the paw off, "You're one odd cat. You'd fit in around here." In his mind, he pictured the kitty with the three of them. He could see the cat riding around on Taylor's shoulders, the two of them making the perfect pair with their red hair and green eyes. They both had personality, that's for sure. Come to think of it, this cat acted almost as sarcastic as Taylor.

_Can cats even be sarcastic?_ Ed wondered. Then he shook his head. What was he thinking? He'd said it plenty of times before; they couldn't keep a pet.

"But if we could, I'd make an exception for you," he told the cat, bringing it to him to cradle it in his arms against his chest.

Taylor briefly puzzled over what Ed was going on about. But then his fingers began scratching under her chin and all of her thinking capability flew out the window.

Ed smiled down affectionately at the purring cat. He had to admit, she was pretty…cute.

Forgetting about his apple and hungry stomach, Edward carried her to the couch and laid down with her resting on his chest and stomach. She made no complaints, her eyes shut tightly. A smile seemed to touch her features as his fingers scratched all through her fur, running up and down her back, sides, and lowered ears. Ed let himself wander in his thoughts, enjoying the company of his feline companion.

Taylor didn't think anything else in the world could feel so inexplicably _good_. Ed's nails were raking over her body with just the right amount of roughness and she relished every bit of it. No wonder cats could be such attention whores.

The alchemist underneath her had said nothing for quite some time, this fact registering in her drowsy mind after awhile. One of Taylor's eyes opened to see what he was doing. Ed wasn't really doing anything, his scratching motions having become absent minded. His gaze settled somewhere above her ears, the blonde appearing to be lost in thought. She wondered what he was thinking. It couldn't be anything bad, his expression was too relaxed for that. Maybe he was daydreaming? Hm, what do Edwards dream of?

Taylor rolled her eyes and snuggled against his chest, loving the feeling of his bare skin and the clean scent of Edward-ness. His hands raked over the contours of her spine, causing her to clench her jaw and stretch somewhat. This made her accidentally prick her lip with one of her fangs, drawing a small amount of blood, but she was too far gone to care. Heaven really was a place on Earth and it was here in Ed's arms. The only thing that would make this better would be if she was human enough to fully embrace him.

Ed snapped out of his daze when the purring fur ball lying on him began to emit a flare of heat. Perplexed, he glanced down to the cat and his eyes grew as large as saucers when she began _glowing_. If there was one thing Edward Elric was sure of, it was that cats _do not glow_. And yet, this one was. It started off as a slight glow, accentuating the cat's russet colored fur. Then the glow intensified to a bright red light that kept getting brighter and brighter as a hum filled his ears. Crackles of energy came forth from the small body, reminding him of alchemy. Edward was too in shock to push the cat away from himself or jump away. All he could do was gape in alarm.

Taylor frowned when she felt her lip sting suddenly, the taste of blood leaving her mouth as heat struck her body. She opened her eyes only to be blinded by a flash of light.

When the light dissipated and both of their vision focused, they found themselves to be in a very precarious position. The ginger haired cat had disappeared and in its place lay a very naked Taylor.

* * *

**Oh I am so evil for leaving it off there. XD See how far I'm getting carried away? Well, I'm going to get even _more_ carried away in the next chapter...if you catch my drift. ;)**

**Truthfully, Taylor wrote a small section of this. Can you guys guess which part? Was it the ninja cat part? The part where Ed goes to get a shower? Ed finding Taylor reading? Ed offering Taylor milk? Or was it the very end where she transforms back into her human self? I'll give you a hint, it's one of the five parts I mentioned. Speaking of Taylor transforming, it's pretty obvious what changed her back but if you don't get it, it'll be explained in the next chapter.**

**Um, no idea when the next chapter will be out. It'll be, uh..._difficult _and _new _for me to write. Again, if you catch my drift...**


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